It has been a while!

Time has definitely went by quick since the last time I made an entry on this blog. I realized that it the chaos and being super busy never stop after nursing school. I am finally working and I LOVE.. Absolutely LOVE being a Nurse :) I love my patients -- nice, ones, grumpy ones, and scary ones a like haha.

I don't know for some reason I get reports about patients that are supposedly mean and scary but they're nice and pleasant to me. So I'm not sure what to say about that, other than people --- in general will respond to the types of energy you give them and so far that has worked with me *fingers crossed*

Anyway, I haven't been working out or eating any different since I started my journey as a tax payer LOL. But I tell you -- being on your feet for 12 hours day, running around and rarely getting the chance to sit down sure pays off!!

I lost 10 lbs since working I honestly did not think I'll ever got over that 173-170 lbs hump I've been on since --- FOREVER!  haha

Anyway I am 163 lbs. Haha you would think stress would make you fat. I know cuz that's how it was being in school. But not working apparently.

Maybe it's all a fluke -- but I'll take it! <3

I haven't gotten the chance to keep up with my favorite blogs and I sure hope everything is having a good holiday season!

Okra chips anyone?

I was at the natural health food store this morning and picked up some snackies for me this week. I came across the okra chips. I figured what's the harm in trying it -- I had sampled the kale chips and loved it very much.

I was... interesting. LOL

I can get used to it --- I think. :)


How open are you trying different foods if it means it's health and good for you?

Guess Who Has A Job!!!

Me! Me! Me!

I got my first interview yesterday at a hospital. I was actually a bit nervous so I was giving myself the peptalk the whole time.

"Just be yourself."

"If don't get the job then think of it as practice for others interviews that will come along."

I arrived 30 minutes earlier just to give my interviewer time to wrap up whatever she was doing at that time.

I immediately clicked with my nurse manager -- she was really friendly and nice. I don't know I felt really comfortable with her and I think she was too. Chemistry was really good. I was interviewed by 2 people -- one of them was the nursing manager for the unit I applied for and the other one was the Director of Nursing. The DON was a lot more serious haha and actually she kind of got me a little nervous at first

I was asked a lot of professional, situations, behavioral, and clinical questions. Call me a nerd but I brushed up on my Professional book days before the interview just so I feel more prepared. Heck! I busted out my clinical skills book too just in case they ask me about anything that pertains to what I 've done in the past. But most of the stuff I reviewed were subjects that pertain to the unit that I applied for.

Anyway, towards the end I had lunch with the T and when I was driving home I received the call from them and they offered me the job! Haha how cool is that! :))

I still need to pass background check and my nurse manager told me that I'll be working day shift and she hopes that I start by early-mid October

Surreal!!!!!!!!!

I'm feeling a little weird because I really want to do well in my job and I'm anxious and excited at the same time.

But I guess I don't want to go all out and celebrate because I still need to get my offer letter but I just had to share my excitement :)

Woooo!

Banana "Pancake"

Ingredients:
1 egg
1 ripe banana
handful of raw almonds

• Mash banana and beat egg with it
• melt just a little bit of butter ** optional but it made it a whole lot of difference in taste (in my opinion)
• Cook it like a pancake
• Garnish with almonds

Review:

I'm actually very surprised with this recipe because I didn't think it would taste good and it sure it. But the awesome part of it is that it has lots of protein but less on the "bad" carbs that comes with regular pancakes. I like it! and would make it again when I'm craving pancakes

My only suggestion is probably make the size of the pancake smaller in order to flip it over the pan easier. The whole mixture is soggy and since there's no flour to bind it together better there's high risk of your pancake falling apart.

****************************************
Haha I've been behind with my 30 Day Weightloss Challenge questions. I've been somewhat busy (I know right? even after nursing school -- there's never a nonbusy day). What I'm doing is mostly applying to several places all day but each application is so long and tedious that it usually takes me the whole morning and parts of the afternoon.

By the time I finish I had to go to the gym and by then the Mister comes home and we hang out the rest of the night.

So anyway here goes the question:  Why am I losing weight? And Do any one in my life know that I'm trying to lose weight. (This is 2 day questions)

I am losing weight because I want to look good and be healthy. It's a simple as that. I'm not trying to impress anyone other than myself. It is also due to health reasons. My mom started on Procardia in her middle 30s.. I honestly don't want to fall into that. Hypertension and stroke ran in my family. At least I know if I am in better shape that I can somewhat beat the odds and live a little longer.

Also the hubs and I are planning to have kids in the near future so I want to be physically healthy to take on that tasks. It's crazy how much stress a woman has to go through bringing a child to the world --- literally and figuratively speaking!

Damnit! I'm still losing hair! It's thinning so much I'm freaking out. I still haven't figured out but I'm betting on low thyroid levels. I have a doctor's appointment soon so hopefully the labs will give a clue to what's the deal.

And yes, T knows I'm trying to lose weight. Although he always tell me that he has heard about this for years now and he has yet to see anything. LOL I know right? so much for support But I honestly don't let it get to me. Life happens and if its a 3 year plan or 10 year weightloss plan so be it. What matters is that I'm not giving up and I'm making and implementing changes.

Have a great week all! I'm off to enjoy my "pancake"! Cheers!

Let's Go to the Job Fair!!

It was actually a last minute thing. My BNB (best nursing buddy haha.) asked me if I wanted to come so I'm like suuuurrreee....

It was at least 99 degrees outside that day. And I was wearing a freaking suit. By the end of it all, I was sweating behind all the places I did not existed (like behind my knees).

After a couple of hours I limped back to my car (my shoes were killing me).

So the job fair was advertised at one of the "largest" held in my area... ahh.. no.

There was one healthcare related company and they're only asking for volunteers.

yay.

Anyway the good thing about it all was when my BNB and I went to Marie Callender's afterwards and had pie (to smooth our bruised, disappointed hearts.. no doubt)

Can you tell I went off the diet --- so readily I might add.

Hopefully there would be more opportunities in the future. We were joking around about opening our own facility and hire all new grads.. with that we would all have jobs haha.

Anyway that's my bitch and grip for the day :-3

Okay! onto weight loss Day 4! The question was: what is my greatest fear in weightloss.
I suppose my greatest fear is becoming so smoking hot and getting into a lot of debt because I will be spending a lot of money shopping every chance I get because well.. now clothes will fit me so much better and I'll be totally cute right? haha

But seriously.. It's not much of fear but more of being out of the comfort zone. It means I have to constantly watch my diet.. I have to constantly have to exercise and honestly it takes too much effort and too much energy to actually lose weight. There. I've said. I'm plain old lazy.

I like not having to think about what I'm eating all the freaking time.

Really...isn't that what we all must do (initially anyway) to jumpstart weightloss? Is to watch your portions.. watch the type you shove in your mouth?

Wow I never realize how therapeutic this is.

Okay so how about doing a lifestyle change. Been there done that.

I guess the whole point of this all is do what works for you. In my case, it's probably a slow and steady process and eating the right stuff gradually.

My biggest challenge is probably portion and the choices I make. I am an notorious emotional eater.

What about you what is your hang-ups or fear when it comes to losing weight?

Pleasantly Suprised

I just wanted to say thank to you to everyone who has been following my journey from nursing school till now :) Quite honestly it feels really good knowing that someone actually reads the stuff I write about over here. I appreciate you all!

Also I would like to do some same, so please if I don't have your blog address let me know so I can also follow your journey.

So going back to the 30 Day Challenge list I posted yesterday. This is Day 3

I don't believe in "thinspiration" because I don't want to be thin --- I want to be healthy and gravitate more on having toned muscles.

Let me list the specifics. Healthy as in good numbers ie. blood pressure, cholesterol levels, triglycerides... Geez the last time I got my cholesterol checked it was 190. I think it's still hella-high. My blood pressure has significantly improved since I finished school.. haha probably attributed to a lot less stress.

But anyway, here is my "fitspiration"

I guess most can say that the epitome of fitness is having a flat stomach... six pack.. whatever. But I love a good toned legs.  Hopefully with more zumba I'll tone my legs in to time!

So there it is folks. I hope everyone is enjoying their week!

It's always a weightloss challenge

I came across this picture and I thought it's rather interesting because it provides you daily reflections that relates to one's weightloss.

I think is helpful because losing weight is really never about the actual loss of fat in our bodies but rather a gain of self-awareness.

Of what you want

Of where you want to go

Of how you are going to get there.


I pretty much cover the question for Day one...but let's review:
CW: 170 lbs
GW: 140 lbs
time frame:  16 weeks
Height: 5'2

Hmm.. do I like my height. Honestly it'll be nice if I was a slight taller but hey that's just how the genes roll so who am I to bitch about it.

So today, I'm on track in the food department. And later on today I'm off to zumba.

Been applying to several places -- wow what a pain. It surprises me how there's all this talk to nurse shortages but most do not hire new grads.

Does that make sense to you?

What happen to beggars cannot be choosers? I'm a little frustrated that it makes me want to eat a nice fatty cheeseburger and call it quits.

But hey.. I've gone this far --- do you honestly think a thing like that would discourage me.

Reconstruction --- First Day

First Day of well.. post nursing school and NCLEX. I think eventually it will sink in when I'm working ---- soon I hope.

Right now I'm just revamping my resumes and scoping the job terrain that looks pretty fierce. The downside of it all is having very little experience and most hospitals are all over one year clinical experience minimum.

The goals for this week is..... *drumroll*

• consistent exercise
• cut down the carbs and processed food to 2 days a week
• drink more water

I know it sounds pretty familiar because I've said that before. This time there's no more excuse or crutch to lean on.

My ultimate goal is by November-December to lose about 30 lbs.

Current/Goal Stats:
SW:  170 lbs
GW: 140 lbs
Time Frame: 16 weeks
Weekly Goal: 1-2 lbs loss

Fitness Plan:

• 1-2 hours cardio session (Zumba/Kickboxing/Run) - 5 days/week
• 30-45 minutues strength training/circuit - 3 days/week

Nutrition Plan:

• Carbohydrate/Processed Food Reduction (limit to 2-3 days a week)
• Hydration 2-3 L/day of water
• green tea/black tea for appetite control
• Sweet/dessert reduction limit to 2-3 days a week

The Verdict

 

I Freaking Passed!!!

Last night This morning at 3AM my hubby woke me. I patiently asked him if he knows what time it is and it's nowhere near the hour we're suppose to get up usually.

He "enthusiastically" kissed me saying that my license was just posted on the Board of Registered Nursing website!!!

Apparently this wonderful man of mine has been checking since 2 AM to see if the site updated. He was probably just as anxious as I was haha :)

Ahh... I can breathe now.

I honestly say it hasn't sunk yet haha.

I am so humbled. Thank you God for always looking out for me.

The AfterMath of NCLEX

Pre-game or Last Supper -- I guess it all depends on how you look at it

The battle with the NCLEX dragon commenced yesterday 0800 sharp.

Ego bruised and tattered to bits I came out of it after 6 hours when the screen went blank at 210 questions.

They weren't kidding about the NCLEX.

So nursing students -- don't be cocky. Study. Study till your eyes pop out. You never know what kind of questions you get or whether the NCLEX gods will smile upon you and give you the easy peasy question. Actually don't wish to get the easy peasy question because that means you're failing.

Mine started off actually--- doable. The questions were analytical but it wasn't so easy that I can just automatically know the answer -- I still have to think about it.

 After question 25 that's when I got pounded by the hammer of "select all that apply", priority questions, hot spots, and "sequential orders". I got one freaking math question! which was disappointing cuz those were easy. I had like 2 psychsocial questions which are also easy.

I honestly felt like the "computer" was punching in all directions aiming for a knockout. After the "75 question cut off" I wasn't sure if I should rejoice or cry because it means that I'm not in the passing line and required more questions. People that cut off at 75 either successful pass or successfully failed lol

So I took a piss, scarfed down one Danish (from the free continental breakfast at the hotel I stayed in overnight), sipped water and dove back in.

At 100 questions I started to panic -- thinking oh god I'm totally failing! But I guess it really depends of how you look at it because one may say it's still positive because the computer is still giving you questions -- there is still a chance. I took another break and ate the second Danish I smuggled from the hotel.

Question 180 is when the tension headache kicked in. I couldn't concentrate and I started getting the shakes! My brain was dried and needing to eat more than just a measly 2 cheese danishes. Unfortunately I don't have any other snacks left. I was pushing my body and my brain to cooperate and march on.

I had moments where I felt the urge to run and scream out of the room haha. I'm laughing now but it was super real at that moment. It was kind of like that flight or flight response you get when you need to get on stage but you're sh*t-faced nervous to do it.

I found myself praying for strength during the test. I honestly was starting to feel claustrophobic.  I wanted to just give up for the sake of just getting out of there.

But I mentally shook my head and reminded myself the very core reason why I am doing this and what I was striving for. There is no option to give up.

So by Question 205 I was praying for absolution. At this point the questions were becoming a blurr and they starting to look Greek to me. I honestly have no clue what was being ask anymore and was guessing. By this time my mind was screaming --- Kill me already. Then by question 210 the screen went blank and I was done.

I wobbled out of the test area.. took another piss. I took the elevator and waited for T to pick me up. I turned on my phone and found messages from my family and friends wishing me luck and that's when the tears came running down. I felt like I FAILED my whole family and everyone that was counting on me because there's no way in hell I would have passed with the way things were going down.

Test result comes in 48 hours. Till then I'm holding my breath.

To be continued....

My Boring Blog

I really have to apologize for those who still read my blog (if there is anyone out there) because honestly it has been neglected and looking pathetic these days.

I finally got my NCLEX date so all I've been doing is really studying for it. I hope my hard work will pay off when I take the exam (praying and studying)

Honestly my eating has gone a bit out of hand these days and frankly because I really haven't cared much about I put in my mouth. Although I exercise almost everyday sometimes twice a day, my food choices has been lacking.

My weight has been maintained to a sad 170 lbs. which is good considering how much chocolate I've been eating since.

I will try to do better and do my best and really get into this. I hate being the way I am.

There is no nursing school to use as an excuse!

Omurice

Made some Japanese Omurice for lunch! It's sooo yummy! haha I think I've been watching way too much anime lately!

Been going to the gym and somewhat eating right :) People have been telling me that I looked like I've lost a couple of pounds.. but honestly I don't see it haha I think being "tanned" make me look skinny! haha

I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Yea yea.. I'm a liar

I did say I was going to update more but I was on vacation 2 weeks ago haha ;)

I'm finally back from Hawaii and I can't say I wanted to be back. I didn't want to leave!  Still waiting to schedule my NCLEX I'm hopeful by this week.

I don't think I'll be eating any spam or rice anytime soon in the future cuz that's all I ate in Hawaii lol. It's all good though

 I'm on vacation damnit!

here are some photos from out trip

Luau at Paradise Cove -- honestly the show was good but the food was horrible :(

 

prized loco-moco

I swear Hawaii has the best farmer's market I have ever seen I love it!

waka-waka

Ahhh... it feels good to just do things without a schedule ---- for once! :)  So 2 weeks post-grad I've been taking some NCLEX workshop that cost me an arm and a leg (so I better go to them) last week. That was over and now I'm just enjoying the summer and recuperate!

After our Hawaiian vacation, I plan to hit the books again and study for my boards.

Workout -- I've been consistently going to gym everyday for an hour and it feels good to just sweating it all out

Food wise -- I also been doing good. I haven't succumbed to any sweets since the beginning of the month so I'm pretty stoked about that as well

My beginning weight was a whooping 176 lbs  and now I'm 170lbs. Most likely water-weight since I lost it all within 2 weeks of hopping back in the weightloss wagon.

This coming week's goal is :

• intensify my workouts by increasing incline and resistance
• increase veggie/fruit ratio
• drink more water

Next Order of Business ---- NCLEX

Ahhh it's finally official! --- Look out world! Nurse Gertie is in the house!!!

It really does feel good --- no it's freaking spectacular to be done. But this is all just the beginning. I'm ready to proceed to next chapter of this journey and pass the NCLEX, get my license and finally practice :)

I'm also looking forward into getting healthy and losing all these post-school weight (haha kinda late post-baby weight)

I'll be updating more and focus a bit on losing weight and recuperating from this 2 year program

If I were to give advise to all the nursing student out there... it would be.

• One, believe in yourself. Sometimes its so easy to doubt your own capabilities, you really know more than you think.
• Two, never change your answer, the first answer is almost always the right one -- stop overthinking it and only answer that is being ask. If you must change the answer, it has to be 100% certainty -- not because it sounded good.
• Three, pray or meditate.. whatever works to focus your energy and your mind to a positive place in times of stress (like before an exam or waiting for the result of your exam)

Afterthought

Breaking up is so hard to do…

Taking down the makeshift calendar with pen scratched marks of days and weeks gone by of nursing school

Boxing and sorting worn out textbooks that seen the good, the bad, and the pathetic

Nights when I shuffle through flashcards and break down because I just didn’t have enough time to pull it together.

 Looking though my clinic bag and finding stow-away alcohol wipes, lancets, and glucose monitor strips.

 I feel this sense of sadness in saying goodbye.

To my Brunner’s and stacks of power points that became a part of my life through this journey.

 My stethoscope stares at me with anticipation of things to come.

 Does it seem right to just pile them away in a plastic bin and never look back? Maybe there is bigger underlying issue that I refuse… no… reluctant to see.

 Saying farewell to the band of pathfinders who fought alongside the fierce academic terrain with me.

There were no competitions.
No one cared who got the best grade or the worst.

 We are brothers and sisters who felt the joy of success and the loss within each other.

These very people I have come to care about and love. The second family that I have spent more time than anyone else I know.

 So, there is no goodbye. A bond will always remain enduring for the rest of my life.

See you on the floor Nurses. The journey – our journey has yet to unfold.  

hehe maybe not.. :) back to studying --- Finals Tomorrow!

Wait.... I think I just found my niche.

just finished my last clinic day in tele.. man .. am I tired.

tired physically...
tired mentally...
tired emotionally...
tired emotionally... did I mentioned I'm tired emotionally?

I am just ready to be done and move on!

My group rotated today in the ER.  and honestly I have a good feeling that this is a place I'd like to be when I grow up haha.

But I'd like to start off and gain a few more experience at the med-surg floor before I dive into ER.. maybe even ICU.. but I think I'd pee my pants if I land a job in the ER.

Anyway, I have one more exam to go before the final praying and making plans to do well so I can somehow enjoy the fact that I'm graduating.

 It's hard to get fully excited and happy when you think about grades. I'm passing, but I'd like a little wiggle room for the final.

Now a little nursing school humor for your enjoyment haha :)

Late Night Post

Actually 11:30pm is pretty early for me. But I'm tired of looking at my notes and powerpoints. So I'd give my bugged eyes a break to do something I actually enjoy -- which is this :)

Crap.. 36 more days and counting.. shit.

Things move really fast don't they? I finally received my white graduation dress, my white shoes and stockings... It's sooo fracking surreal I don't feel it even if I pinch myself.

All I need is a passing grade in medsurg and I can finally breathe! It's torture -- you have no idea

I've got about 2 more -- wait. 3 more major exams to go and I need to pass these suckers. haha forget A's... just pass em' because honestly if anyone is THAT smart to ever go through these infinite amount of information to absorb and know -- frack.. might as well be a doctor.. because that's exactly how this feels like.

Nurses are like the gate keepers of patient care. We're doctors, pharmacist, physical therapist, case managers, psychologist, glorified waitresses.. the list goes on and on.. lol so yea... you kinda need to know like.. everything? :/

haha of course I'm over-exaggerating.

so 36 days.. I was filling out my NCLEX exam form.. got butterflies just thinking of finally having that 2 magical letters after my last name.... R.N :) Can't wait for that.

My love-bug booked a Hawaii trip post graduation so I'M FREAKING EXCITED.

God. I'd hate to have fat pictures on my dream vaca. But that's another stress added to passing nursing school and quite honestly I'm about yay high above quota.

So I'm not gonna think about it just yet. I'll worry about it when I'm done with this program..

June 2.. save that seat for me muthafracker.. because I'm going to graduate!!!!!


PS. Thank you soooo much you ladies. especially Jenny and Jewelz.. for all the awesome support. You ladies are the best <3

Goodnight! I'm hitting the books --eerrr. *splat*

it's all about the YODO

Seriously....

no really. I meant it  I am seriously SICK of school ... akkkk! 57 days and counting I think that's 7-8 weeks

It's seems a little surreal especially when my graduation dress, nurse pin are all ordered -- I honestly don't feel prepared for the real world LOL

but as many nurses say, the huge chunk of learning never stops and most of it is learned on the job. I'm currently rotating in ICU --- it's exciting and a bit intimidating well at first anyway... But as the week went by it wasn't as bad as I initially thought.. you learn soo much and that's one of the things I love about this rotation.

my clinical instructor is nice.. but she's menopausal lol.. I only say this because she's nice and joking around at one point then switches to scary-I'll bite your head off kind of deal. Not to me specifically, but I hear stories from others. So it makes me feel intimidated when I work with her. She's seems nice to me, but I'm always on my toes because I never what to see the scary side.

I figured whatever. I'm here to learn and I'll take it as that

What else.. I did better on the exam 2 -- barely. lol I'm sooo not out of the woods just yet, so I'm consistent in busting my ass in studying. My mom always tell me to relax and take time to rest. But I don't think she understands the intensity of nursing school.

I feel bad sometimes because the stress gets to me

I bark.. growl.. and snarl at people in my house.. my hubs and the doggie. And I feel guilty because I know it's not fair to them

I honestly can't handle anything else but school right now. and it sucks.

I guess it would have been even more difficult if I have kids. And it's amazing how others how juggle school and kids manage all of that.

Well I didn't plan on making this a mini novella titled whiner's corner: life of a nursing student.

Sorry for not updating [for those who follow my blog --- thank you all <3 ]  I have been living under a rock and numerous piles of textbooks. I was actually in spring break..

but what nursing student EVER have a spring break? To non-nursing students are like.. yay! spring break I'm going to the beach!

the nursing student would say, yay! spring break -- I can finally catch up on studying...

how crappy is that?

Anyway, was given the opportunity to get my ACLS certification for dirt cheap -- but I didn't take it cuz I needed to just concentrate on studying. so there.

Quite honestly, I did took advantage of sleeping in and sleeping early, so I don't feel as "tired" but I'm sure that will all change again on Monday

Anyway, diet is just as crappy. I haven't been to the gym or exercise for a LONG time and I'm feeling it

Anyway, I hope everyone is having a good week :)

Rough Semester

It has been a rough semester so far.. I'm so busy it's darn ridiculous. I'm tired, cranky and brain dead. Did AWFUL in my first exam. The questions seems so personal, as if the all the teachers are out to make sure I fail and never become a nurse.

Sigh.. yea sounds pretty morbidly depressing.

I'm trying to cope with it by studying harder and doing better next time.. My only comfort right now is that knowing I'm not the only one that gotten a D on the first exam. In fact the majority of the class did.. Yikes..

Anyway, my health is also deteriorating lol .. I'm scheduled for an US next Friday and hopefully it's nothing serious.

but on a good note. I'm trying to put my best foot forward and just freaking survive nursing school

I kept my gym membership I figured it'll force me to get some exercise -- if I have a free 30 minute in the week -- which is rare as I anticipated in the beginning.

two-12 hour shifts with homework in between is brutal. I wake up at 430 to get to school, don't get back till 9pm. I stay up till 1030 to finish my careplan that's due the next day. Wake up again at 430 then go home at 9pm.. fun fun fun

Thank god it's only 2 consecutive days..

Anyway I hope everyone is doing good :)

Happy Friday! <3

Back to studying.

School is fast approaching..

Some people like to end their vacation with a bang. Others... like me  end their vacation a week earlier to "get organized".. call it easing the idea that I will not have a life anymore once school starts.

It's really difficult for me, for some reason this time around to ease in school work a week before it actually starts.

I've been trying to jumpstart my brain for a week now.. but it just doesn't want to leave the vacation mode.

But I think once school really starts (this Monday) I'll get back to the swing of it whether I like it or not.

I have SOOOooooooooo many crap to do. Maybe that's why my brain refuses to respond. It went overload after reading the syllabus.

I have ECG, ABGs, IVPB, IVpushes, Med admininstration via tube feedings, Foleys, cardiac meds...all to review.

I'm excited and terrified all at the same time. My final semester...*Insert Rocky eye of the tiger music here*

Bring it I say.

*record scratch* Ugh...I want more vacation!!! >-<

I'm going to try to at least exercise 30 minutes on days I'm not in school. I know for a fact that I will be dead tired after 12 hour clinical shifts 2 days in a row. So no way in hell I'll be at the gym in between those days.

I'm also going to try and eat right. I know my biggest weakness during school is stopping by fastfood. I get so busy in the day that I never had time to eat during shifts so I am a raving hungry monster by late afternoon.

trail mixes will be my friends.. lol

Oh Kermie...

you were delicious...


Had frog legs last night.. It's amazing what goodies you can discover at the local asian market -- I wish we live closer!

Hmm.. you're right.. they do look like naked bottoms.. >.<

I pretty much cooked it in butter, basil, garlic (lots and lots of garlic), fresh lime juice tossed some heirlom tomatoes and green onions --- viola! I would have added some coconut milk, but I didn't have one available in my pantry. Maybe next time

Been hitting the gym hard. I did 2 hour of exercise last Thursday, Sunday, and this Monday. I am aching but it's all good.

Exercise has always been easy for me once I have it in my routine. It's the damn food/diet department that I fail miserably.

I try to eat right, but it's really hard when craving hits or when T buys stuff that's not diet friendly. Like for example.. the oh so sinful vanilla chocolate chunk muffins from Costco

Lord these buggers are 690 calories EACH..... and they're sooooo fracking yummy..

it sucks...

I suck...

Haha now you know why I'm at the gym.. trying to redeem myself..

14 Day Diet Review

Well as I said before the I have the tendency to swing between 167-170 lbs. and this week was a great example of that. I dipped to as low as 167 lbs and now I am back to 170.

With only 3 MIAs at the gym in the last 14 days with 3 cheat days from diet --- the result is no result.

But that's ok. I don't expect a miracle overnight and I'm going to continue doing what I do and eventually the good ol' body will catch up.

I did got some compliments from fellow classmates when they saw me the first time since December and said that I looked different and appeared to have lost some.

I soaked into that and savor it like chocolate. It felt really good, even though the scale doesn't say I've lost any.

I made a promise to myself that this year will be the year where I'm kinder to myself.. nicer. I'm not going to deny or hide from compliments and finally acknowledge my worth and what I'm damn good at.

For years, I shy'ed from anything that puts me in the spotlight because I never want to appear self-centered or egotistic and attract attention. Frack that.

I need to realize that people are people and I can never please EVERYONE no matter what I do

The important lesson for this week is :

It's not about the scale or what life throws at you that determines your success, it's you.

The continued diligence to move forward is the key whether I lose some or gain some --- it'll all fall into place in the end

I just need to work harder and always remember why the heck I'm doing all of this.

I will get there.

Day Off

Today was kind of a day off.. went to lab and brushed up some clinic skills that we're going to be "tested" when school starts. I like being prepared so I came in to play with IV pumps and G-tubes.

I didn't work out today since I'm still sore from the last kickboxing and zumba class. I can barely walk up and down the stairs... but it's a good indication that my muscles are waking up and getting worked up. I just need to give them time to recover.

Here's the today breakdown of Intake for today:

1 banana
2 hard boiled eggs
1/2 cup of HM chicken salad
6 inch Togo's turkey and cranberry sandwich on honey wheat bread
1 Trader Joe's vanilla meringue cookies

Spark total it up to 1175 calories (under 1200 so totally fine with me)

Diet Intervention

This is a way to keep myself accountable of my daily activity and keep track of my weightloss

Breakfast:
2 cups of coffee with amaretto cream
2 hard boiled eggs
1/2 cup of HM chicken salad
1 banana

Lunch
1/4 cup of HM fried rice
handful of trail mix

Dinner
4 oz of broiled salmon with leeks (olive oil and parmesan cheese)
1/4 cup of garden salad (bits of blue cheese and boiled egg)

Fitness
60 minutes Zumba

Rock and Roll

Yesterday was a good day at the gym. I took a kickboxing class and enjoyed myself immensely. For some reason, I get a burst of positive energy and euphoria even...when I punch and kick training bags lol. Seriously I felt like I was high.. ok I've never gotten high ever in my life but damn!

Oh yea.. and eye candies.. I love my Mister but sometimes a girl can't help herself and appreciate the eye candies at the gym. It makes one want to work harder.. What a great motivator!! :)  -- I sure hope my honeyboo is not reading this LOL  I love you babe!!!

Anyway, I went home with bruised knuckles (I had a lot of pent up energy.. what can I say) but feeling good.

I know I'm not suppose to do this till next Sunday but couldn't help myself. I peaked the scale and I'm down another pound.. 167 lbs. I'm trying not to get too excited because honestly I tettered between 170-167 lbs all the time thanks to Mr. Waterweight.

But I was honestly expecting a gain this morning because I was hella-sore this morning. I'm excited anyways and I'm even more motivated to reach this week's goal of 166-165 lbs

I just need to do the following:

• Control my portions
• Recognize quality choices
• Drink more Water
• 30 minute in the gym is better than 0 minutes at the gym but a 1 hour is even better!

Shape like a Banana It's nothing Perverted I promise

Based on my body measurement, it was indicated that I am a banana shape kind of woman. There were other categories: apple, pear, hourglass

donut... jk donut shape was not included in the given categories but I thought I was a donut shape for while until Calculator.net straighten me out of that confusion

Ah the banana...


from we heart it .com

I guess I'll never be that 36-24-36 woman the the Commodores were singing about..

Not quite the same when it's 40-37-41 LOL

Hell.. I'm actually ok with that. Be it a banna.. an apple.. or a brickhouse.. I am happy whatever it is that I am because my shape does not define me.

my weight doesn't define me and it's high time I get that in my brain.

Happy monday all.. Don't forget to eat a banana.. it's heart healthy and sexy as hell!

7 Day Diet Review

Start weight: 170 lbs
Bust: 40 inches
Waist: 38 inches
Thighs: 24 inches
Arms: 13.5
Hips: 41 inches

Current weight: 168 lbs (- 2 lbs)
Bust: 40 inches
Waist: 37 inches (-1.0 inches)
Thighs: 24 inches
Arms: 13 inches (-0.5 inches)
Hips: 41 inches

This Week's Goal Weight: 165-166 lbs

This Week's Food Challenge:
Quality vs. Quantity. Eat foods that are calorically significant.. continue avoid empty calories.

This Week's Fitness Challenge:
Quality vs. Quantity. Aim to run on 5% incline half the time.



GRADE FOR THE WEEK:   A-  
Target weight achieved. Could be better with the choices of food in some days. Good job on the exercise department. It was a lot difficult during craving phase due to TOM, but overall a solid start. Keep it up the good work!

Good Morning Gorgeous

That's what my coffee cup says this morning...



You know you're right.. I am feeling especially RAVISHING this morning...

Auntie M's visit is coming to a close. Got my zumba on this morning. Lost 2 lbs of water weight from the bloody visit. It's great!


Today's Challenge:  smaller portions

 Why:  To gain more control and discipline over food. I'm not taking orders from my first impulse -- the fear of being hungry

 Doing about it:   awareness while eating. Knowing what I'm eating, while I'm eating. Putting more thought of the ACT of eating that actually just eating

 Comments:   So far so good. All I need to do is to keep it up!

 

Result:  Lunch was chicken wrap, with 4 pieces of onion rings. 

This Morning...

Version in my head:

It was a beautiful morning! *Sparkle-Sparkle* Clear blue skies, the air is crisp and refreshing. What a perfect day to take my baby doggy to the neighborhood dog park. Put on my wool coat, my burberry scarf and gloves. Brewed my coffee to take with me to enjoy while Daisy (my basset) sniff at her heart's content *Sparkle-sparkle*

What actually happened:

It was a beautiful morning! Clear blue skies, the air is crisp and windy as hell. I figured it wouldn't be that bad *insert optimism here* despite the occassional COLD wind gust.  Off the the doggy park! Daisy got way too excited and dragged me across the parking lot. Spilled hot coffee on my wool coat and burberry knockoff scarf and gloves*Akkk! for the love of God!* all the while she continued to sniff with her heart's content

LOL. That's ok nothing a good dry cleaning would fix I guess haha :)

Happy Thursday Everyone!

Every Diet Starts With Blood, Sweat, and ... tears?

Blood.  TOM started today. woo.fracking hoo. But despite the fatigue and the transient dizziness I managed to hit the gym and had a good workout. Very proud

I SWEATED like a piglet and loved it. I know sometimes it's difficult for me to get my butt off but once I off I go all the way. I always strive to finish strong. No half wussy efforts are allowed here.

In fact I exercised so hard, I didn't realize that I managed to TEAR my yoga pants.. I have a ghetto whole in the insides of thigh area .. LOL.. too much rubbing I guess.

I'm officially retiring this old yoga pants. You've served me well my friend.

Diet wise. I'm doing ok. It's usually more difficult than most days the week BEFORE my period, but I managed to stay clear of desserts and sweets. My hope is that I'll get better once I progress through my detox.

I seem to crave the worse of foods when I'm trying to eat clean.

Whipped

Workout with Jillian Michaels was punishment beyond words lol.  Every time a circuit ended I thought was done, but nope! My hammys feels like chopped meat this morning.

No pain. No gain right?

Right.

I'm still deciding if I should work out or skip to let the under-used muscles time to recoup. Hmm it's probably a good idea.. so we will see

What I've eaten so far today:

• 2 cups of peppermint flavored coffee mocha
• veggie medly with small piece of roasted chicken and 1/2 cup of HM chowmein

Workout
Thinking of doing I did a quick total body circuit:

• 10 Divebombers
• 5 burpees
• 10/10 squat lifts
• 5 burpees
• 10/10 curtsey squats
• 5 burpees

from Desperate Measures

I thought this photo was pretty hilarious! haha totally can related from the Waterfall pose lol

Noodle-Carb Dreams

It has been 3 days I went low to no carb regimen... meat and plants.. meat and plants.. *gulp*

I want noodles!!! >.<

There I said it. As we speak the asian in me is winning the epic battle of carbs vs. no carb war.

I stepped away from the hotpot to clear my head and really think about all of this.

 Haven't been in the gym all day either and it's probably too late to go since they close in a hour.

Damn, which means I've got a date with Jillian Michaels later today. ugh.

I woke up this early this morning actually feeling energized than any of the previous mornings in a very long time. It's fracking great!

I've been snacking on dried coconuts and honestly I really should tone it down abit. Here's some more boring daily statistic to take you further off this boring post :)

What I've eaten so far:

• 2 cups of coffee with sugar free creamer
• soy sprouts with egg, tomatoes, chopped ham, cilantro
• dried young coconuts

Did I work out?
Not yet. Will update later

Any random thoughts
.... nope

The Tale of the Tight Jeans

We all have some sort of weightloss goals measured in unique ways. My goal is to eventually fit into all these various sizes and achieve my ultimate weightloss goal. Each of these jeans has a story to tell and these are mine.





Goal #1 - No more Stretchy Pants - American Eagle Jeans size 8

This is the all familiar jeans that's in my closet right now. I refuse to buy a bigger size because for one, I'm broke.. and second I've got soo many.. but they don't fit.. yea I'm crazy.

So I suffer the consequence of muffin tops and snug as hell fittings. The first goal is for a looser fit that does not strangle and squeeze my internal organs haha.

We all have our self-made disordered delusions standards for our own bodies and this is my own. I honestly can say I cringe at the sight but even more motivated that ever before to make some change may it be small or life-changing.

Any good changes will do damnit! I'm just so sick of myself and this fat prison I allowed myself to be in.

I want to be honest with myself and realize that no one else can make me feel better about myself until I accept me and this is not me.

Boring Daily Stats

What I ate today:

• Stirfry Beef, shrimp, and octopus
• 2 pieces of sashimi
• 1 cup Chinese Chicken Salad ( no dressing or wontons)
• Dehydrated Coconuts (sooo tasty! I've had about 6 little pieces throughout the day)
• 2 cups of coffee (cream and vanilla sugar free syrup)

Did I move my butt?

Yes! 45 minutes run/walk interval

Other thoughts:

I feel great. energetic maybe it's the coffee but so far so good. I'm glad I made the effort for the gym. Scale read 174 lbs two days ago and now read 168 lbs. So definately waterweight from the ham and the sugar consumed during the holidays.

No More Stretchy Pants

So today, I've made a very difficult decision.. *sigh*

No... more.. Stretchy...Pants ...

Wahh!!!!!!! :(

This will force me to get off my butt and get in gear of weightloss. The size 8 denim is snug as hell.

But I will endure.

I've got a good 30 days to make over my eating and in the process of all that I'm getting back into working out 30-40 minutes at a time.

Here's a recap of what's been done so far :

• 40 minute run/power walk interval
• I've eaten 2 poached eggs and 4 oz of steak
• 2 cups of coffee and cream - 1 splenda
• veggie medly (carrots, broccoli, avocado, tomatoes) and ground beef for dinner

Also instead of weighing myself with the scale and getting obsessed over the numbers I'm going for how my jeans fit. I will be using different sizes of jeans I've had throughout the years and use them to measure my goals and progress -- check out and see!

Oh I'll still weigh myself but I will concentrate more on how it fits.

Holidays are now distant fond memories and now it's the time to get back on track and with the precious free time I've got right now...

I'm taking advantage of it! :)


Quote of the Day  "Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

What I'm listening right now - "Hard" by Rhianna

Am I hungry? - No I am not, but I'm feeling the familiar pang that makes me want to look what's inside the fridge only because I'm bored

Will I do it? - No.. writing about it helps.

Intervention - I'm going to play HipHop Dance for WII

Woooo! Happy New Year Y'All!!

 

Wishing everyone a super duper new year!! It's gonna be an epic year!! :)

 

 

Couple of people were missing this year's family xmas gathering (my sister's fiance, my little brother, his wife and my other nephew) but that's okay. There's always next year!

 

Sorry for being MIA for a freaking long time!! I just got caught up with everyday things, school, watching countless animes and korean dramas LOL yea.. yea... haha

 

I managed to maintained a solid 167 lbs but that's seems like a fainted memory when I stepped in the scaled (Finally!) this morning.

 

I hope everyone has a fantastic holidays! :)

 

I'm currently on winter intercession and I don't get back to the grinder till February.. which is AWESOME! But I'm still required to prepare for the last and final semester till I GRADUATE!! Wooo-HOO!!

 

Lots of things are in the works right now... but I'm taking them one crazy thing at a time. So for now just concentrating on passing my program and graduate

 

I miss you people!

 

Now.. let's get back in gear and lose some muffins shall we? :)